May 20

No winner, but some weirdness, or at least funness.  (The IPad likes neither my playful approach to the English language nor my charming spelling.  It constantly wants me to change things.  Shut up, machine!  You have no soul.  You have no poetry.)

Billboard just off the interstate:  "Cowboy Church - Branded for Christ."  What, I ask, is the theology surrounding human branding?  There is an ick factor here almost on a par with transubstantiation.

The next one was more fun.  Now, I want to believe that Texas has some statute banning advertising for nude dancing and that some sleezebag club owner has found a way of sticking it to the man.  "Whisper Cabaret - Fabric Free Entertainment."

The scary one was just down the street from last night's lodging.  It was a Chevron station so I started to pull in when I finally noticed orange cones and other impediments to entrance.  Then I saw the sign: "Closed for Tornado Damage.  Opening again soon."

There was a miracle about 85 miles north of Houston - pine trees.  Southeast Texas seems fairly well graced with what I think are large live oaks - hard to tell when you are zipping past them - but pine trees, large ones and lots of them, were mighty unforeseed.  (Stupid machine changed that to "unforeseen," the bastard.)  Quite nice.  (I mistakenly typed "quite."  Think the idiot machine would change it to "quite?"  Why, no.  No, it did not.  Bastard!)

Anyway, I am in Spring, a town just north of Houston, visiting friends I haven't seen in years.  You know  friends are truly life friends when you can visit them after so long and it will be as though we last saw one another yesterday.  I say nice things because I expect them to feed and shelter me for awhile.  Also, very nice house.  I am sitting in their living room on one of two leather sofas arranged at right angles.  They share an ottoman bigger than most tables.  They are clearly 1 percenters who will suffer righteous justice come the revolution.  But they left me a key to the house and bottle of wine whilst they are out and about.  So I hope nothing bad happens to them.

In license plate game news, west of the Mississippi I cover all states but Hawaii, no surprise there, and South Dakota.  That is a surprise.  Usually, you can spot a lot of S. Dak plates.  Escaping, possibly.  But now they seem to be staying at home.  Or maybe they've already all escaped.

Pete should be here in about 45 minutes.  I'm going to try to convince him that we should go to an upscale place, order a couple of Patron Gold margaritas, sit at the bar and look about for evil doers.  He probably won't go for it.